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This Edition


Guide to Crusty Culture

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InformAnt Contributions

in HoleWorld

Anatomy of a Crusty

Colonization and you

Santa Claus Merry Christmas Santa Claus Merry Christmas

  This photograph was taken by an informAnt who submerged near the famed Slick Rock mountainbike trail in Moab, Utah. " I was shocked. I was expecting to see Utah's amazing beauty and instead I saw this:  A huge stinky garbage dump right in the middle of paradise."

   The editors of THE HOLE PLANET felt this photograph was the perfect pick to grace the cover of this holiday issue. Crusties around the world need to get a grip on their mass consumption. The amount of trash generated by you guys is staggering.  So  while  we  brace ourselves for the impending onslaught of Tickle- Me- Elmo boxs down below the surface we thought we would take this  opportunity  to clear  up some confused Crusties.

   First of all, you know that song you hear around this time of year ... "Here comes Santa Claus"? There is that line "Santa Claus knows that we're God's children, that makes everything right." That is not true. Think about people

like Jeffrey Dahmer and Imelda Marcos. While we are on the subject of "JINGLE TRASH" let us clear up another little lie you will hear this time of year. That Stetson Cologne ad you have seen on television for about 9 years in a row now, well, you may have missed it consciously but your subconscious mind heard "Easy for you, easy for you, Stetson makes it easy for you." This is also not true and every year the UNDER WORLD gets stinkier because of it.

  You must try and shake free from the grasp of big brothers brain suck. He will stop at nothing to sell you crap you don't need. Slap yourself a few times and  see  with new eyes. Know that you are a very gullable organism This year take a look at the amount of trash piled at the curbs in your neighborhood  the  day  after Christmas and then imagine all of the other neighborhoods and then think about all of the Christmas's past and all of those to  come  and try to imagine where you're going to live when that trash takes over.